Healthy Sexual Identity

Healthy Sexual Identity through the Eyes of Ephesians 5

Speaking of love , Ephesians 5 is our ‘go-to’ chapter on human relationships and how to love who.

“And have nothing to do with sexual immorality, lust, or greed—for you are his holy ones and let no one be able to accuse you of them in any form. Guard your speech. Forsake obscenities and worthless insults; these are nonsensical words that bring disgrace and are unnecessary. Instead, let worship fill your heart and spill out in your words.”

Ephesians 5:3-4 TPT

Avoiding Sexual Immorality and Sinful Behavior

Did you spot the words sexual immorality’? Are you one who reads words like this, and automatically your brain blanks out while you read to a more comfortable topic? Or whose inners thoughts are secretly cursing, wishing this kind of behaviour was allowed? Or if neither, what is your natural response? 

Why then are we talking about sexuality?  The answer is, because it is NOT the same as sex! It is not the same as the acts of sex-related sins, the greedy, debased, behaviour that can come from uncontrolled emotional pain.

The Significance of Healthy Sexuality and Worship

We find that even bringing up the word ‘sexuality’, which has the s-e-x letters in it, often offends – conjuring up hidden feelings of shame and embarrassment, making it a tender no-go taboo. 

The clue to avoiding sexual immorality is found in the last sentence of verse 4: “Instead, let worship’ (or in other versions, ‘thanksgiving’) fill your heart and spill out in your words’. 

Healthy sexuality leads to thanksgiving for our bodies, which are fearfully and wonderfully made by a loving God family, where the Trinity said: ‘Let us make man in our own image’ (Gen 1.26).

Healthy, covenant-protected sex is an act of worship and thanksgiving where our bodies, souls and spirts unite in mutual, grateful submission to one another.

Healthy covenant – which includes, protected sexuality, allows us to confidently live out our callings in work, relationships and leisure. Sexuality is the  core of how we view ourselves, how we integrate into our culture and how we relate to others. It develops and evolves through every stage of life. Healthy sexual identity is one of the important threads that pulls our spirit, soul and body into one. 

This famous chapter from Paul’s letter to the Ephesians, begins with receiving God’s love, then avoiding body-only cravings by giving thanks, before serving up specific suggestions for loving well.

The Impact of Sexual Identity on Overall Well-Being

At Sexuality Matters, we understand that the root cause of many sexual struggles and unhealthy behaviors stem from a deeper need. We believe that the need behind the greed and lustful behavior can only truly be addressed with the good news of God’s love. Our mission is to help individuals understand that they are unconditionally loved by a God who desires to be present in every aspect of their daily life.

We believe that by establishing a strong foundation of God’s love, individuals can begin to work through the underlying issues that may lead to lustful and debased behavior into healthy sexuality. Our approach starts with spreading the message of God’s unconditional love and acceptance, creating a safe and supportive environment for individuals to work through their struggles.

Through this process, individuals can learn to recognize their true needs and find healthy ways to fulfill them. Rather than relying on temporary fixes such as pornography or other sexually explicit material, individuals can discover the true joy and fulfillment that comes from a deep connection with God.

Photo by Priscilla Du Preez on Unsplash

Helping Loved Ones Escape Sexual Addiction through Sexuality Matters

We offer a 40-day devotional to help loved ones escape the need for pornography or other sexually explicit material. This devotional provides individuals with a daily dose of encouragement and guidance as they work towards a healthy and fulfilling sexual identity. Through this program, individuals can learn to recognize and respond to the love of God in their lives, ultimately finding freedom from the need for lustful behavior.

Written by Jennifer Webster (Andre’s wife)

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